Mental Fitness: Decluttering Your Mind Today so You Can Organize Your Thoughts Tomorrow

Emotional well-being. Psychological resilience. Mental health. 

Call it what you want—the point is we all have a brain and therefore we all deal with mental fitness in one way or another. Unfortunately, some of us come from generations where counseling or therapy wasn’t just uncommon… it was looked down upon.

As a result, we grew up with preconceived notions about the whole concept, some of which included shame, guilt, and fear. 

So what’s a human with pain points to do? Here are four things I’m working on that you can too. I’m far from mastering them, but I’m seeing progress. Hallelujah, amen, pass the guac.

1. Pray

Seem too obvious or not active enough? Remember this… though it’s not tangible, prayer is our most powerful tool. You’ve probably heard Philippians 4:6–7 many times, but have you ever read it in The Message version?

“Don’t fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God’s wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It’s wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life.”

Prayer can be an excellent way to declutter your mind. You do your part and then let God do His!

2. Tell a Trusted Someone

Not just any trusted someone though. Someone who can actually hold a secret like a vault. 

I have a few people like this in my life and I can’t tell you how comforting it is to trust that when I share something personal/private they won’t ever crack. Like, ever. Not to their spouses, not to their best friends, not to their pets, not to their therapists… no one.

I practiced this “telling someone” thing recently with a good friend, and I have to say, before I admitted my dilemma I felt nervous. 

Scratch that—I felt shaky and anxious with a side of nausea. Everything in me wanted to keep my issue a secret, act like I was fine, and move on down the road to the ice cream shop.

I knew giving it a voice would help it lose its power though, so I moved forward, ignored my blood pressure, and did it afraid. During the whole conversation I vacillated between wanting to cry, and almost throwing up on her, but I gradually recovered and can now testify it was worth it.

Been there? The decluttering of the mind with a trusted friend is a beautiful thing. I don’t care if you’re a dude with a beard and work boots—it’s still beautiful. 

Photo by Joseph Pearson on Unsplash

3. Go to Therapy

Now that you’re ready to do some mental healing (haha… you’re ready, right?), you’re gonna have to suck it up, admit you need help, and fork out a few pesos.

If you identify with the Boomer Generation (born ’46-’64), there is a high chance you might not have fond thoughts about counseling or therapy in general. On one hand, it’s not your fault—your parentals most likely didn’t model such things back in the day. 

If the perception of therapy revolved around suicide, sex addicts, and straight jackets, I can see why you wouldn’t think highly of it. You probably thought you never needed it either because compared to those guys, you were holding it together like a champ. 

These days, however, most of the Gen Z population (born 1997-2012) would tell you therapy is definitely the key to healing and growth. According to multiple online surveys, approximately 55% of all Gen-Zers and Millennials have been to therapy.

Compare that to only 8% of Boomers who have been to therapy and you can see why most teenagers and 20-somethings don’t relate well to their grandparents.

And then there’s my generation: the Gen-Xers, stuck in the middle of these two groups who don’t usually see eye to eye, hoping we can just see some progress in our lives. I’ve discovered that most of us middle-agers are in therapy (or at least open to it), but a lot of us don’t advertise it. 

Until of course the person rollerskating next to us admits it first and then we blurt out, “Oh my gosh, me too!” as if we’ve been holding our breath for a decade or three, waiting for hidden solidarity.

How well do you think you know yourself? Yes, emotional intelligence is on the rise, but you have to actually get on the bus, buckle up, and be willing to slowly lurch forward. 

A fantastic therapist has an amazing way of cutting through the crap and helping you declutter your mind so you can organize your thoughts. 

Highly recommended. Five stars. 

“Honesty is often very hard. The truth is often painful. But the freedom it can bring is worth the trying.” ~ Fred Rogers

4. Be Brutally Honest

This one isn’t my fave. Admitting certain faults or weaknesses out loud can feel brutal, I know.

In my 20s and 30s, I thought I was doing pretty well in life. But in my 40s, I started doing the work to learn more about myself and finally admitted I had some glaring gaps. 

It’s only been recently that I started becoming brutally honest. Honest with myself, honest with a couple close friends, and honest with God.

Sound fun or easy? Haha—not even close.

So why is it so common to ignore pain, paste on a smile, and embrace denial? Maybe part of it included the Christian church back in the day. Not sure what was happening in your ’80s and ’90s world, but mine subconsciously encouraged the word “fine” to be on the tips of our tongues at all times.

Dress up, go to church, tell everyone you’re fine, keep smiling, go home.

“The first thing is to be honest with yourself. You can never have an impact on society if you have not changed yourself.” ~ Nelson Mandela

If you haven’t started this journey yet, it’s never too late. If you’ve been on this healing road for more than a minute, keep going, friend. No one said it would be easy. But those who do the hard work get the greatest rewards of freedom and peace.

Allllllrighty then. Wasn’t that light and fluffy?

Are you in the midst of decluttering your mind or organizing your thoughts? I’d love to hear about it in the comments.