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Two Cops & a Black Eye: Our Up Close & Personal Encounter with Physical Abuse
Living in Mexico brought a ton of unusual, funny, memorable experiences. Even the hard times sound like a picnic compared to the night the cops dropped off an unexpected guest. Our large property consisted of five double-wide mobile homes, a fire pit, trash and tool hut, huge water tank, fig and pomegranate trees, laundry lines, small patch of grass, and enough parking for about 25 cars. Some locals knew exactly why we were there, and others had no clue. Like all the other nights, I stood in our double-wide, all jammied up and cozy, brushing my teeth in peace. Between spits I saw lights flashing through our small bathroom window,…
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Home Sweet Trailer in Baja: Abraham’s Forever Faith in My Face
I am no longer a journaler. Journaler? That’s a weird word. I engaged my pens decades ago, especially when the subject matter revolved around boys, but then I tapered. Since then I’ve started and stopped more than start-stop technology in city traffic, but I just can’t get into it. So now I use them as notebooks, and I’m totally fine with that. No more guilt. For years I couldn’t figure out why I didn’t want to journal anymore until I realized the list involved reasons I didn’t want to admit. Mix together slight perfectionism and the constant inner critic of an Enneagram one, with a full schedule and a woman…
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Corner Office Syndrome as a Boss: When it’s Always Lonely at the Top of the Business or Ministry
A few years ago I reported the results of a missionary survey I did and was surprised by their answers. (Especially when they matched mine.) With global loneliness at an all-time high, I thought I’d take a closer look into the phenomenon where some people might not look. The old cliché, “It’s lonely at the top” rings loud and true… 92% of missionaries I interviewed said yes to this question: Do you ever suffer from Corner Office Syndrome? (Knowing a ton of people but not having any real friends.) “Totally. I have lots of friends on Facebook, but nobody checks on me; I always have to reach out. It’s hard…
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Donate This, Not That: Tips to Donate with Dignity
I know… I’ve had good intentions that went awry too. I’ve donated things I probably should’ve thrown in the trash. I felt guilty about the blatant waste though, so I passed it on for someone else to hopefully benefit from. Trouble is, if an item falls into that category, it’s probably going to end up costing the recipient more time than it’s worth. I never truly understood this principle till I moved to a 3rd-world country. Pretty sure the ministries in Mexico get more donations from the U.S. than any other nation, but after living there for 12 years, I’m not confident the helpful handouts outweighed the inconvenient/annoying ones. For…
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Stress: Top 5 Factors for Kids and Adults
Psychologists say the most stressful changes for children are (in no particular order) moving, divorce, losing a pet, death of a parent and death of a sibling. And for adults? According to Health Status, the top five include moving, divorce, major illness, job loss and death of a loved one. Since moving is one of the highest stressors no matter your age, we know our whole family sits on the brink of needing to breathe into paper bags while counting to nine in Danish. Not really. But maybe. Even if you’re only moving down the street, you still need to empty cupboards, pack boxes, and then unpack in a new, unfamiliar…
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10 Secrets Missionaries Keep, Part 2
Last week I shared the first five questions and answers from missionaries around the world about the secrets they’re keeping regarding honesty, Corner Office Syndrome, guilt and MKs. If you missed it and want to catch up, come on over! Obviously becoming a missionary in another country should not be entered into lightly. The common thread running through those of us who call ourselves expats is we’re committed, but missionary life tends to be harder than we let on. Most of us have great intentions of meeting needs, but being honest about our own is not usually on the radar. This week we’re talking about marriage, money and moving, along with a bonus…
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10 Secrets Missionaries Keep, Part 1
Depending on the country, you might think being a missionary means having a bunch of faith, eating rice, praying all day and swinging in a hammock. But unless you’ve taken a trip to visit a missionary, you might not see the challenges behind the scenes. Even then they’re probably not telling you how they truly feel about their marriage, raising support, and those donations you sent. I emailed a list of questions to 39 missionary friends, asking them to be brutally honest and open about missionary life in a foreign country. I got back answers from India, Canada, The Middle East, Mexico and Italy. I took the survey too,…
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Easter Fail
I knew he was familiar with the Easter story, but I had never heard our seven-year-old try to re-tell it on his own. We only read the full account of Jesus’ death and resurrection once a year; I expected him to get a couple details wrong. Pride welled when he began. Then perfectionism kicked in and disappointment welled when he continued. Not disappointment in my boy—in me and my parenting skills. We use a visual aid called Resurrection Eggs and the carton contains a dozen plastic eggs, each one containing an object to help convey the meaning of Easter. For example, in the orange egg you’ll find praying hands, and the…
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10 Años of Blessings… and Mud
Where were you on February 28, 2006? Not exactly a national day to remember, I know. But for us it was the day we moved to another country. To another culture. To another life. Our oldest was four, I was 35 weeks prego with our second, and we spent our first night in Baja, Mexico. Actually, in El Porvenir. But more specifically, in a 5th Wheel trailer. Have you ever tried to sum up ten years of your life in a few hundred words? My life in suburbia could be condensed rather easily: got married, got a job, got a puppy, bought a house, chaperoned a bunch of proms, pulled weeds,…