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What the What? Didn’t See THAT Comin’
I cooked in my kitchen when the house phone rang. “Sharri has cancer.” I sat in his Jeep when he told me we were done. “I’m loving you more than I’m loving Jesus.” I stood on my college campus when I read, “You have not been selected for the position.” I walked through a Costco parking lot when he called. “Carrie? He’s gone.” I soaked in a jacuzzi when I realized I was the only one not invited to a party. I rode in a van when her voice shook through my cell. “She’s probably not going to make it through the evening.” You didn’t see life comin’ either? It’s…
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Trading Sorry for Thank You
“Sorry I’m late.” “Sorry I didn’t call.” “Sorry about the mess.” “Oh, sorry!” “Oops–sorry.” Enough already. Of course, sometimes a genuine sorry is exactly what’s needed. But I’m referring to all the times when sorry becomes excessive… unwarranted… over the top. What in the world would a public bus be sorry for? That it’s winter? That’s you have to step out onto slush? Have you ever wished someone would stop saying sorry so much? Maybe (like I did) you realize you’re the one constantly saying it. Whether it’s intentional or not, if we’re consistently spewing the word, it tends to lose its effectiveness. It can also make us look guilty,…
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Working Moms: Killin’ It or Barely Makin’ It?
Almost a month into my new job and I’ve collected just enough data to tell you what I’ve learned about being a working mom in the States. It’s complicated. Being a working mom in Baja looked super different for many reasons, most of which revolved around flexible hours and not having to tell anyone when I went to the restroom. Now I’m on the clock for very specific hours and learning to resist checking my cell every 12 minutes for fear someone needs me. No one’s gotten sick or impaled lately, but I assured my youngest he could still reach me. “Buddy… if there’s an emergency, call my office. I’m…
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Praying for Closed Doors
“I don’t know which college to pick. I got into these two schools and I like them equally, but I’m afraid to pick the wrong one.” When we ran a GAP-year program in Baja, MX, each class of students lived with us from August to June. They were all recent high school graduates and no one had lived away from home yet. Tied in knots between quality universities, we watched them makes lists of pros and cons and worry for weeks, sometimes months. Cal Baptist or Moody? Point Loma or Liberty? Baylor or Westmont? Azusa or Biola? If you attended one of those schools, you most likely have a gut…
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Trust, but Verify
Dude #1: “I am so glad I checked.” Dude #2: “I would do anything to be able to go back and check.” Where do you fall when it comes to verifying information that could tip the scales toward relief or disaster? As a mom, it’s my job, my right, and my responsibility to ask my kids questions about their outings, friends, whereabouts, etc. Sometimes (ahem—like this morning) I get major pushback, but I press on. Why? Because regrets carry weight and guilt, and teens actually want boundaries. Prudence: Careful, wise discernment; the good management of talents and resources and the showing of tact and wisdom in relationships with other…
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Back to Work, Back to Reality
His calm voice sounded kind, but his words surprised me. “We’re spending too much and not bringing in enough. I think we need you to start working.” My husband was right, mostly, but the hardest part of his comment was that I already feel like I work. I wish my writing provided a full-time, regular income, but while keeping up a blog and writing a book pushes me forward, neither are helping our bottom line at the moment. I countered with logic. “I’m happy to work a conventional job, but don’t you think we could just cut some corners and spend less?” “Maybe a little, but I want to go out…
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Lord of the Flaws
Though some exasperated parents might joke about dropping their sassy Tweens on an island, I’m fairly certain no parent would want the experience to resemble William Golding’s version. My son brought home his 7th-grade required reading list last month. I scanned it, unfazed until I reached the one title that zipped me right back to my 7th-grade English class and made me cringe. Lord of the Flies still remains one of my all-time least-loved books. Ever. Visions of being totally grossed out to the max and putting it down after reading each chapter still linger. Bloodthirsty boys painting their faces, stalking a beast, killing pigs, and eventually turning on some…
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A Loss, a Baby & Secondary Infertility: What I Learned While Waiting to Get Pregnant
After five years of marriage, my husband and I decided we wanted a baby. Sad to say, I don’t recall checking with God much about this, but He didn’t send a concerned email so I laid my clothes on the bed next to Doug’s and bam—prego. Phone calls, nursery plans and a roomy pair of overalls became the norm. Until I went in for my first ultrasound at twelve weeks and the technician looked strange. Nice lady, but I could tell she couldn’t tell, so I studied her face. “Everything okay?” “The doctor will go over everything with you.” “I thought there would be a heartbeat by now.” “He’ll…
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Family Dinner Questions w/a Side of Candlelight: Getting Your Kids and Teens to Talk
“So…? How was your day?” “Good.” “Anything fun or different?” “Nope.” If this riveting dialogue plagues your family too, take heart and read on. Spreading a sheet or blanket in the family room and turning dinner into a picnic sounds so quaint, doesn’t it? Photo by not brittany shh pls on Unsplash Mostly, yes. But if your brain skips over the cute family bonding part and goes straight to what could happen to your carpet, clothes, knees and back, it’s okay to stay at the table. Better yet, take your meal outside and enjoy the weather while you can. Even though the floor or patio can help breed…
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When You Don’t Wanna Bloom Where You’re Planted
When the Mary Englebreit craze invaded 1996, I joined millions of other fans and hung her calendar on my wall. I liked her one-two faith punch: “Everything is a risk. What if it doesn’t work out?” “Oh—but what if it does?” Over the years my floral style changed, but I now see that she produces black and white art, and her sayings/phrases are clever with a side of sass. For example, you’ll find these on some of her recent cards: “When you thought everything would be easy peasy lemon squeezy, but it’s actually difficult, difficult, lemon difficult.” “When life shuts a door, open it again. It’s a door. That’s how…
